Booty Calls

We live in a very capitalist day and age in which every industry is pushing for the lowest common denominator bullshit, because that’s what makes money. Companies are hard-pressed to make the cheapest, most marketable shit, so that they can make a return on their investment. When legendary game developer Hideo Kojima asked his company for extra funding to finish his triple-A innovative title P.T, they fired him in favor of another developer who made cookie-cutter mobile games. As it turns out, companies prefer the guy that brings in the money, not the artist that invents entirely new genres. So how does this tie into Booty Calls? Well, this too, is largely a mobile game, at least in design. The game is officially a browser game with Android and iOS ports, but realistically, I like to call it a mobile game, because of the way it’s designed. I’ll get into the details later, but suffice it to say; Booty Calls is built around its accessibility. It’s supposed to be super easy to get into and impossible to stop playing. It’s supposed to be catchy, and it succeeds in that regard quite well. So, let’s dive right into what you can expect to find inside this very popular Nutaku game.

A Lukewarm Passion

This game started out as a browser exclusive title, one of Nutaku’s more successful ones. Before we dive into the details, let me just say that I do not judge Nutaku harshly for not making their games a bit deeper and story-oriented. I understand that they’re merely serving up the content that the public expects to see. Nutaku are not pushing their games down people’s throats; people go way out of their way to pay for them. Therefore, I do not judge the company; I judge the people that play these types of games and call them porn RPGs. But, I’ll get over my bias on my own time. Let’s try to be impartial here. Booty Calls is a casual game that everyone seems to enjoy playing. Whether you play it for an hour or binge it twelve times a day, it’s not the kind of game you can have a problem with. It’s smooth all around, in that it’s made to be as appealing as possible. Now, I can very much see some people being repelled by the gameplay within. If they’re looking for hardcore action or an RPG in which the story and the gameplay are interwoven. Still, this is not the kind of game you can hate. You either like it, or you love it. There’s no in-between.

Mobile Gaming and Casual Faps

This game is basically a “one size fits all” offer for every single demographic except children – obviously, since children shouldn’t be playing smut games. But, all the adult demographics are covered in one way or another, and I’d like to show you how. First of all, you’ve got perverts like me. We’re the bread and butter of the porn game industry. Most porn games are made for people like us, so it’s no wonder that this game is littered with hot hentai inspired sex scenes. You get to see everything. Full-on hardcore penetration can be found throughout Booty Calls. Then there are the less popular demographics like … women. Yes, this game might actually appeal to women. Hear me out. First of all, there are no lesbian scenes or real erotica writing, so the story is very much out of the question as marketable material. No, I think that women will enjoy the actual gameplay. Why? Well, because the majority of female gamers play games like Candy Crush and the like. These are hyper-casual clicker games that are mostly played on mobile platforms. That’s exactly what you get with Booty Calls. Plus, let’s not forget that old people really like their puzzle clicking games, so they’re probably included here too. Booty Calls is the quintessential inclusive porn game.

The Gameplay is Good Enough

When you first start playing Booty Calls, you are greeted by a hot ass, nude ass pink-haired demon chick who explains that for some reason, she chose you to acquire pussy juice for her. Yes, that’s the actual plot of the game. A demon needs you to milk women’s pussies for juice, and you are not going to ask any stupid questions like “Why?”. Here’s where the game gets a bit cheerful. I really liked this part, to be honest. The demon sends you to speak to a nearby chick who’s just minding her own business, and you get some dialogue options. Regardless of what you choose, you end up playing a mini-game through which you curry her favor. The point of the dialogue, instead, is to get you to crack a smile or two. It’s hilarious stuff. The writing is peak humor, as far as I’m concerned. It keeps everything lighthearted.

Playing Hard to Get

Most, if not all of the women in this game, gave me a bad case of blue balls and general anxiety, because I was constantly waiting for them to take their goddamn clothes off. I think I might have actually spent more time on getting these chicks to take my cock up their ass than I have on actual living breathing women. Take a date I was on last week, for example. I bought her a beer, talked for 30 minutes, and then we got a cab back to my place. That’s how real life works. In this game, though, the girls are playing next level hard-to-get, in that you have to play a shit ton of casual mini-games before you get to the real good stuff. Oh sure, you can win at one mini-game right from the start, but that awards you with a bit of implied nudity. That’s all. Maybe you’ll get to keep her panties if you’re lucky. But having sex with her, that’s out of the fucking question. Even though she’s acting like she’s falling in love with you, you will have to match a lot of colored balls before she actually bends over for you. That’s a fucking nightmare.

Playing with Your Balls

Other than my balls which were blue throughout the entirety of my time with Booty Calls, there are a lot of colored orbs in this game that you have to mix and match during what is essentially the core gameplay of this game. The idea is that the mini-game represents your conversations with her. The more points you rack up, the more you’ve succeeded at impressing the bitch in question. On the one hand, this is a great way to motivate you to play more of a game that you might enjoy regardless. On the other hand, if you hate casual match-em-up games, this will drive you insane. You’ll be desperate to see the real smut, and it’ll be hidden behind more and more of a type of gameplay that drives you up a wall. Your mileage will definitely vary from mine, since I can be a bit of a butt when it comes to not getting what I want. I’m just not used to women saying no to me. It only really happens in video games, and I’m still not quite used to it. Either way, this doesn’t cripple the game; it just makes me a bit anxious.

Money Opens Doors

Tony Montana said that the way to get pussy in Miami is to get the money which gets you power, and with power you get all the pussy you want. That’s exactly how the bitches in Booty Calls work. It turns out Mr. Montana knew exactly what he was talking about. If you break open the old coinpurse and make a couple of micro-purchases in this game, you’ll be well on your way to seeing all the smut scenes much faster than someone who’s playing entirely for free. Now, I’m not saying that you have to pay real cash in order to enjoy yourself, you don’t. It’s just a matter of pacing. Spending real money is going to speed things along. If you’re the kind of guy with a lot of time to kill and you like casual games, you should definitely grab a copy of the mobile version. It’s also great for your commute, if you can hide the smut scenes away from prying eyes on the bus. Opinions on casual porn games are so divided that I genuinely don’t know whether this game is a ten out of ten hard recommend or a pass. Ultimately it’s up to you. It’s certainly well made, polished, optimized, and you won’t have any issue playing it. The real question you have to ask yourself is, do you enjoy casual porn games that take a long time to complete? If you do, then Nutaku’s got you covered.