House Party Game

Almost every fucker reading my reviews has played or at least know what The Sims is all about. If you're one of the clueless assholes who love spending time under a rock, The Sims is a game where you control a Sim. A sim is a clueless, virtual shitbag, who you control in the game. Your Sim can be male or female, and you can do anything with them. You can have lesbian relationships, hell you can even romance a whole city if that's what you want.

I do have one problem with the Sims, though. Although romancing is an option, seeing two sims fucking each other is the lowest form of entertainment that exists. House Party is kinda like the Sims, only fucking better.

The game isn't open-world or anything, but you get to control the new guy inside a huge house. The game is fun and is fucking awesome with the sex scenes. Alright, I know I got you at sex scenes. Here's my totally fucking honest review of House Party.

What is it?

House Party is a first-person dating Sim, where you control the new guy attending a house party. The game is very interactive, with almost anything and anyone just waiting for you to click and walk on. The game is very polished and is known for bringing controversy in the video game industry.

Due to its notoriety, famous influencers such as Jacksepticeye, Game Grumps, MattShea, and even fucking PewDiePie streamed their gameplay to millions of viewers. The game is available on Steam. So you don't know what Steam is? First, you don't know what The Sims is now Steam? God, Steam is a digital game distribution service by Valve. It's where you buy and play games. Again, House Party is a popular game and currently holds a 97% rating on Steam.

Many reviewers also found the game disgusting. If you ask me, these reviewers are fucking pussies. The main reason for them putting down the game was because it had misogynistic themes. Do I have to explain fucking what misogyny is? Damn, you are one stupid lowlife. Misogyny is simply hatred towards women or anything feminine.

Fuck those pricks. It isn't misogynist if the girl you're fucking pounding screams wanting more. What's fucking wrong with plowing a girl who moans because she's fucking loving your dick? Those pricks who gave the game negative reviews should think about that. It's either they are fucking white knights or just haven't fucked an attractive and sexy bitch.

Sorry if I got carried away. No fuck it, I won't be ever fucking sorry against feminazis and their likes. This is an awesome game, and they need to look at it like a game. For God's sake, people, this is a fucking game. Grow a pair and try House party.

Gameplay

Enough of the fucking drama, let's get down to House Party's gameplay. As you start the game, you'll immediately see how polished the menu is. You're presented with options and other settings about the game. And there's also a fucking drunk chick dancing on the side. Great way to start.

You'll also notice that the game CAN'T FUCKING RUN OFFLINE. I don't know, maybe it's me fucking up something, but for some reason, I can't fucking download the stories or scenarios needed to run the game. You need to have a stable connection to connect to servers to get the scenarios loaded, every fucking time you start the game.

Once I sorted out that hiccup, I got to play the game. I choose the original scenario to play. Having no idea what the game was, I was fucking surprised that it was in the first person. That didn't matter to me as I play a lot of FPS shooters like Call of Duty and CS: GO.

Anyway, the first task of the game was to find Derek. Derek is a tall, black, awesome guy who invited me to this party. As I clicked Derek, I was presented with two options: Inspect and Talk. Inspect shows you a description of a character or an item in the game. Talk is well, talking to the character — no shit, genius.

I clicked Talk, and a picture of Derek, along with a friendship, romance, and sober meter appeared on the left side of my screen. The voice acting is okay, and I don't have any complaints about that.

The whole house isn't that huge, but you walk so fucking slow that it takes ages to go upstairs. As I walked around some more, I got to talk to hot chicks all over the place. After a few minutes, I realized that this game was a long drive.

The options clearly told me that I needed to find this and that, this and that, bla bla bla. You know the drill: "Complete this quest, and I shall show you my titties." After snooping around some more, I found out that the game had a lot of outcomes for you to discover. Of course, nut head, seeing naked chicks, groping, and fucking their brains out is included in this game!

What I Like About the Game:

Overall, the game looks fucking, wait for it, good. I have a solid gaming setup, and the graphics weren't a problem for me. The graphics in the game won't wow anyone, but everything works. For example, the fucking grass outside looks more like a carpet. What I do like graphics-wise, are the female characters.

And they tell us that this game is misogynistic? If it were misogynist in the first place, then the girls would look like fucking trash! Instead, we're gifted with hot fucking girls. The first bitch I got to interact with was Ashley. God, this bitch is hot. I mean really hot. After I interacted with her, I knew I had to do something more to get her.

As I went upstairs, I opened the door and low and behold, a pair of huge tits were waiting for me! Every inch of me wanted to grab the tits and the bitch they belonged to. However, common sense prevailed, and I asked the big boobed Brittney as to what she was doing upstairs. As I listened to her, the story also kinda pulled me in. Hey, I'm no softie, but when I see a sexy lady is sad, I also feel sad. The logical thing to do in that situation? Comfort her, offer a drink, and let her suck my dick afterward. This game basically enables you to do that.

After I got tired of the conversations, I searched online to see if I could get to the good stuff quickly. Low and behold, there was a "console" button for me to play with. Listen up faggots; if a game has a "console" or tilde key for you to mess with, it means the game has cheats. Oh, and for you stupid fucks, the tilde key is the one directly below the ESC button on your keyboard.

From there, I became an invincible pervert who had access to omniscient abilities like trapping people behind doors, teleporting, and summoning people, and forcibly taking off their clothes. And of course, I had the power to fuck them.

The console command also gave me the power to call in two ladies and see them fuck each other in a variety of positions such as cowgirl and doggy style. Man, I even had Rachel and Brittney 69 the holy fuck out of each other.

Remember, everything is from a first-person perspective, which means the view is absolutely awesome. The only time it got weird was when I fucked up some commands, which made the action look weird on screen.

What I Don't Like About the Game:

I don't know why the fuck would the game connect me to the server just to fucking download a scenario to play. This bug or feature for me was baffling. Why connect when you can pre-download everything else in the first place?

The design of the male characters in the game is also shit. Given that there were only four guys in the game, the devs could've done a better job. I mean, I'm fucking straight, and I always go for pussy, but in a game, everything should be well-designed, male or female.

I also hate that Frank weirdo. He's one of the two fucking reasons why I skipped everything in the game. He's a righteous prick who doesn't like booze and drugs. If the douchebag catches you getting, drinking, or giving anyone drinks, he'll punch you, and the game is over.

For the love of fucking everything in the world, why would Frank be in a party full of hot chicks, alcohol, and drugs? Fuck off, Frank. If this game had guns, I'd fucking blow Frank's fucking head off at the very start.

The other reason why I went into console commands is that the game is freaking long. I got bored with the conversations and the petty sibling rivalry between Rachel and Madison. I got sick of them fighting, so I went full God mode and made them fuck each other. That's one good way to shut up two hot bitches.

My Conclusion

In conclusion, the game is excellent for a few hours. After failing some challenges in the game, I was frustrated that I didn't get my way. Ultimately, I entered the console commands so I could get straight to the fucking.

I'd say the game is initially boring but gets better as you play it. For those who want to accomplish something meaningful in their life, playing House Party, the normal way is a good thing. For impatient fucks like me, go directly to the console key.