The Fate Of Irnia

It is time for a classic, ladies, and gentlemen. Ah, who am I kidding, ladies don’t read this review, and calling the rest of you perverts gentlemen is a bit south of accurate. Anyways, this right here porn game is a masterful artwork and by that I mean I’ve jacked off to it more than a dozen times, because it’s hot shit. Thanks to Patreon and several hundreds of backers, developer Winterlook has brought us tons of updates. Today, The Fate of Irnia is an absolute masterpiece and it’s available entirely for free. But, what makes it so awesome? And what’s got me so hard? Let’s dive right in and find out.

Playing with a Ball

I’ve been playing with my balls since the day they descended and I’m also a natural breast expert so it’s safe to say I know a thing or two about round objects. The core of this game’s story revolves around one such round object, an orb of sorts. – A magical orb. It’s red on one side and blue on the other, poetically mirroring the duality of man. Since the day we’re born we are torn between our polar nature, between sucking and being given the suck.

All right, enough poetry. The orb is a magical artifact that you’ve inherited and it happens to speak to you, in order to explain itself. Apparently, this orb thing is a wizard orb of awesome sex hacking. It gets into people’s heads and reminds them they want to be bent over. You only really use it on women as far as I can tell, but it gets them all hot and bothered. As for the colors, well, the red side’s always saying cool shit and the blue one is a real buzz kill. One of them wants you to bang hot bitches the second you meet them, the other one keeps talking about love and feelings.

Depending on which part of the ball you touch during key parts of conversations, you pursue different outcomes. Personally, I have no idea what kind of weak ass shit happens when you touch the blue part of the ball. I always just went with the red side, because he felt like a homie. He kept saying things like: “If you touch me, the hot bitch in front of you will be sucking your cock by the time you’re done reading this tutorial”. Naturally, I had to jump on that shit like there was no tomorrow and lo and behold, my dick did get a-sucked.

Medieval Sex Nightmares

Mind-hacking games usually take one of two forms. It’s either the distant future and you use a computer or it’s a medieval game and you’re a wizard. This game’s one of the latter. That means that there are a lot of peasant girls all-over the place who are ready for the milking. Right off the bat, you meet this super-hot bartender chick and if you rub your ball right, you bend her over by the time you’re done saying your first hello.

Right after that, you walk out of her bar, spent and happy and you get jumped by a hobo and a dude with a mace. The latter of the duo promptly bashes your fucking brains in and takes all your shit. Then, you go to the afterlife and meet death. She has huge tits. I’d like to hope that when I die, I open my unearthly eyes to see death-breast. Anyways, she explains that not only is she super-hot, she’s also very generous. Apparently, you’re not supposed to die on the day you’ve just started celebrating your life. She gives you a death curse that you can use on another human being, to take their soul in place of yours and then she rebirths you back into your body, which she patches up for you. I was surprised to see that she didn’t actually mention the sex-orb.

Anyways, you wake up, freak out the thug with the mace, dodge his attack and bash his brains in. Then, you pick up your shit and get the hell out of there before the cops come. You go back home and jump straight into bed. I very much like the kind of protagonist whose first instinct after dying and being brought back to life is to go and take a nap. But, it’s a good thing he chose to do this, as the second he hits the hay, his mother starts masturbating in front of him. Here, the orb starts talking again. The blue side lets you play it cool and normal, that is, not do anything sexual at all. The red side lets you get her all the hotter and bothered and I’m pretty sure that if you rub this side, down the line you’ll be rubbing all of your mother’s sides. Gotta love branching questlines.

Visual Novel RPG

I’m so used to the visual novel approach to porn gaming that I no longer consider it a genre. It’s more of a stylistic engine choice, letting artists and writers make porn games without having to learn advanced coding. I’m not even complaining at this point. I’ve seen developers spin really original novelty in Ren’Py and similar engines. Sometimes they add combat, other times there’s an open world.

The Fate of Irnia is one of the latter. This is an open-world exploration visual novel, with no actual combat. I like that there’s no combat, because if there were, you just know they’d have found a way to cram in farming and grindy dungeon encounters. That’s the last fucking thing I want from my porn games. I want to get to the point as fast as possible. That’s exactly what I get here.

There’s a ton of story, a ton of talking, but the sentences are brief and to the point. Plus, in true Ren’Py fashion, you can skip as much of the dialogue as you’d like, if you’re in a hurry and you’re afraid that your boner might come down. So, all in all, I like the way this game is structured.

Usually, the worst thing about visual novel porn games is the lack of actual interactivity. Sometimes they let you choose what to say, but it’s rare that those choices actually make a fucking difference. Well, just by having the goddamn blue-red orb mechanic in this game, you get a ton of shit to do. It’s always a rewarding, boner-inducing feeling when you know you got to a certain point in a game by your own merits. It makes the sex scenes all the more arousing.

Hot Sex Scenes

I’m a little bit on the fence with my opinion of the sex scenes, because, on the one hand, they’re really hot, on the other hand, they’re short as shit. Take the very first scene in the game, the one I mentioned earlier, with the bartender. Before you see anything at all, you first get a black screen with a bunch of text describing the action. That’s a hell of a cold start.

After a few lines of what can only be described as black-screen-fucking, you finally get to feast your eyes upon this chick’s naked form and … it’s underwhelming as all hell. You see her back, from above, so I’m guessing you were doing it doggy style. That can be hot, if someone actually bothered to draw the rest of the woman. Hell, they could “move the camera” and show you some tit.

But alas, you see none of that. It’s just her back and a tiny part of her ass. You can see that she’s hot shit, but you barely see anything that you can call smut. It’s just one tiny, short-lasting image of a chick looking up at you. It’s not my idea of fap-worthy content.

Hell, you actually get more smut a few minutes later when you perv on your mom jacking off. There, you get a full-page spread of her body while she’s touching herself. You actually see her from head to toe. Now that’s a lot closer to jack-worthy, but even then, it’s just the one image. I really wish they could have gone further with the best part of the game. Given how many sex scenes they advertise, it’s possible that shit just gets better the more you play, but I wouldn’t know, the game’s way too long to play through in one sitting.

Either way, it’s completely free, so it’s not like you’re going to regret downloading it. Give it a shot and see if you get immersed in the story. If you like the characters and the general vibe of the writing, it could just be your next favorite porn game, who knows?