Porno Apk

Porn Games Apk! There are a lot of porn game sites that look like dogshit, but serve up hardcore smut that’s worth playing. Porno-Apk goes hard down the road of looking like it was designed during an 8th-grade code-a-thon. The website is literally just one vertical strip of content that takes up 10% of your screen. Never in my life have I ever seen a website make worse use of a computer screen. But, it’s not made for computer screens, is it? As you may have guessed from the name, this website is built for mobile and mobile-only. Sure, you can browse it on your computer, but that’s not the point.

This website serves up APK files. For the uninitiated, APK files are basically installations for your phone. You download one, run it and bam, you’ve got the app installed on your phone. No need to let Google know what you’re up to. Personally, I hate this convention of having to go through Google Play to get my hands on quality apps and games, pornographic, or otherwise. Why the fuck does Google need to have a monopoly on my content library? I want to keep that shit on the down-low, you know what I’m saying? Well, that’s what Porno-APK is for. They keep all of your information on the down-low, because they don’t take any of your information. They host links to quality porn games that are built for mobile, and they let you download them, no strings attached. This is the kind of site you check out daily, during your routine morning shits. It’s the kind of site that makes any phone a worthwhile device to have. After all, what’s a smartphone without some smut games, am I right?

Smart Category Names

Whoever made this site knew exactly what they were doing. They organized the games into neat little categories that get you exactly where you need to go. I’ve seen sites sort their games by genre, so you’ll see topics like action and RPG, but that doesn’t tell me jack shit. Take Lust Epidemic, for instance. That legendary smut piece by NLT Media is a top-down game that more or less mimics the RPG Maker games of old. But, is it an RPG? Not really. Sure, you are role-playing as a character, but there’s no leveling up, there’s no combat, you don’t really have stats, and the game is linear. Is it a visual novel? Kind of… but not really. Standard visual novels cram the gameplay into the conversations, not world exploration. Visual novels don’t even have world exploration. So, what is Lust Epidemic? Well, if I were to explain it in as few words as possible to someone who knows his shit, I’d say that Lust Epidemic is a Ren’Py game. And just like that, the other person would know exactly what to expect.

So what’s Ren’Py, and what does it have its own category as a genre on this site? Well, it’s a game engine. You’d think that a game engine that has no strict limitations could fit any and all kinds of games, but that’s not the case. Ren’Py based porn games are super popular, and even though they differ from one another, they share a ton of similarities. Almost all of them have top-down open-world exploration. If they don’t let you move the character around, then at least they let you click on locations that you can visit, like in Summertime Saga. Once you’ve arrived, the visual novel interface kicks in, and you speak to people in a standard dialogue. The sex scenes in this game are usually non-interactive, but give you some choices like “cum inside” and “stick it in her ass”. When you tell me that a game is made in Ren’Py, I immediately know what it’s going to feel like, even if I’ve never played it before.

That’s why I’m super glad that they chose to include Ren’Py as a type of game on this site. It’s a category that’s loaded with all kinds of different titles. There’s western styled porn games, hentai games, role-playing games, but they all have that same vibe.

Pre-Releases and Alphas

Half of all quality porn games out there are still in development. It has something to do with the fact that your average porn game studio makes money off of Patreon. They get paid regularly, so it makes no sense for them to actually wrap up a project, unless they know they have another one around the corner. They can’t risk losing their backers and the funding that comes with them. So, they make an amazing porn game that leaves a lot of room for future updates, and then they cram content into it regularly, sometimes several times a month.

Well, the boys behind Porno-APK knew this, and so they made sure to give you several categories that let you sort by completed, on hold, in progress and abandoned. That way you know exactly what you’re getting yourself into. I would suggest you avoid the abandoned section your first time around. There are more than enough high-quality porn games for your phone that have been finished. But, you can think of the abandoned section as a sort of forgotten coal mine that might hide a few gems that people haven’t dug far enough to discover. A porn game doesn’t have to be complete to be good; it just has to be hot.

As for the in-progress and on-hold ones, well, you know how it works. They have something presentable to hold you over to the next patch, hopefully, and you wait eagerly for the next update. It may or may not come, you never know. Either way, I’ve never seen a porn game that didn’t at least have some smut, so it’s not like you’re downloading anything that isn’t fap-worthy.

Flash Games

This is where I got a bit confused. I tried to understand what they meant by Flash games, because as far as I know, Android phones can’t run Flash, period. Yes, you can get Flash to work in a browser, if you’re tech-savvy, but running Flash directly as an app is out of the question. Well, there’s a little notification under every flash game that says that Porno-APK are porting games to android, Flash, and Ren’Py. No, that wasn’t a typo, that’s exactly how they’ve spelled it out. I suspect that what they’re trying to say is that they’re re-doing entire Flash games using Ren’Py and then publishing them as Android compatible APK installations.

If that’s the case, then I’m over the fucking moon. Just imagine the potential. For every native Android porn game, there are at least a hundred Flash porn games. That’s a huge ratio. Now, imagine a world in which we can port most of these to Android and give them some new life. I would love to play Super Deepthroat on my phone with motion controls. That would be fucking amazing.

Incredible Service

You’d think that a website that’s entirely free to use and gives you access to thousands of porn game APKs would, at the very least, dick you around on the download page. Nope. There is literally no sign of any bullshittery when you try to download a game from Porno-APK. You have to fill in the simplest captcha in the world, consisting of a few numbers. Once you click the download button, that’s it. You don’t get rerouted. You don’t get told that the download is being prepared. You’re not asked to wait. The file just… starts downloading. I know I shouldn’t be impressed by a website actually doing what it’s supposed to, but my standards and expectations have dipped so low in recent years that I’m just blown away by this concept. I half expect websites to demand the blood of my firstborn at this point, before they direct me to my download link. It’s nice to see that Porno-APK are not about that bullshit.

Great Design

It’s just like me to start a review by griping about how a website looks like dog-shit, then do an entire dedicated section on how the design is immaculate. What can I say, I’m a literary hypocrite? Truth is, I always review sites on my PC first, before I move on to checking other devices. I made that mistake here, and it cost me a few impression points. On my phone, this website looks absolutely pristine. Everything is laid out top to bottom and given ample space, so you don’t accidentally click the wrong link.

The site is not particularly sexy to look at, but who the fuck cares. You get a list of porn games that you can filter through; you have access to online-only games; if that’s your shtick, you can search for specific games using the search bar, and of course, you can download games with a single click. You literally could not ask for a better mobile website.