AdultGamesCollector

Here we go again. Adult Games Collector is a free porn game downloading site that I consider a curation site, first and foremost, because all of these games are available elsewhere and they’re probably easier to download if you avoid this place. You use sites like AdultGamesCollector for the news and the selection. I can’t believe I’m going to say this, but there are a few too many porn games out there for me to keep track of and while I am doing my best to keep track of them all, it’s a never-ending daunting task. Sites like AdultGamesCollector are basically helping me out. They keep their ear to the ground and they find new titles for me to enjoy. Then, I pass those down to you, if they don’t suck.

You can pretty much use AdultGamesCollector the same way. You come here, you check out the games, you sort by categories and you enjoy yourself. If I had to rate the overall quality of the selection of games on here, I’d say it’s a decent 5/7. These games aren’t bad. Far from it. Still, I feel like they’re sort of mixed in at random. They feel unnecessarily padded somehow. On the front page, I’m seeing 3DCGs, text-based games and a few dumpster fires that someone strung together with duct tape. Feels bad, man. The home page could use a lot of work. 

Ugly Ass Site

The general layout of the site is giving me a bit of a headache. It’s either that or the seventh coffee I’ve had today, still, I hate this design. It’s shit. I don’t mind the grey colors and all, but the games are sort of framed in a god-awful way that makes me not want to play them. It sounds weird, I know, but there’s just something painfully awkward about this design. All the parts are there, but they feel fucked up. I don’t know a library of porn game screenshots can look this annoying, but there it is. It’s hurting my eyes. I think it has something to do with the basic-ass font they’re using. Feels like they made this site in Notepad with no styles. Look at me getting all technical.

At least the categories work. The very first category, funnily enough, is abandoned games. Smart. Put the dumpster fires on top. That’ll increase your retention rates. Then, we’ve got flash games. Then there are the 2D and 3D games, which is code for games made in Ren’Py at this point. There’s also a porn games category which makes absolutely no buttfucking sense, considering these are all porn games. Finally, we’ve got a completed games section, which should just be the homepage as far as I’m concerned and there’s an Android section for mobile games. Great, so far, the dumpster fire smells, but at least you can douse it in piss long enough to move past and get your hands on a porn game. 

Difficult Time Browsing

Well, you don’t necessarily get to download the porn game, but you do definitely get to learn of its general existence. What I mean is, this site technically has free download links but they’re buried in so much bullshit that I doubt you’ll ever actually manage to get one of these games on your PC before you give up on the idea and fap to some regular porn instead. They’re using external file hosting sites, which is fine in theory, but the sites they are using take forever to give you the download if you don’t pay them. Fuck that noise. Also, you often get bounced through an affiliate link page when you try to get your hands on the games. If you so much as want to see a screenshot of the game, you have to wait for an entire ad to load across your whole screen first. This is unacceptable.

Let’s scroll down lower on a random page and have ourselves a terrible time. Below every game you get a related games section to find more bullshit of the same kind. In theory, this is a great idea. In practice, AdultGamesCollector managed to biff it so bad that this place is straight up causing me physical pain. More than half of the games don’t actually load. The ones that do look like a joke. Oh, and there are of course random affiliate links slipped in. They have nothing at all to do with porn games. This whole place feels like a mismanaged attempt at making $5 and jumping ship.

Has Potential. Fails Hard

Like I said, all the parts are there, but the execution is completely non-existent. It’s sort of like a child’s idea of what a website is like. It’s kind of like a child coded this site. I don’t understand how you can fuck up this badly when you could just use a free template for the whole thing and get a better result in under five minutes. It’s really not that complicated. You could automate the whole damn process if you wanted. Some people just suck at running their own websites. I know that not everyone can be me, but AdultGamesCollector is really pushing it. My bullshit meter is off the charts.

Yes, they are linking to me in their header and I am very grateful for that, but I’m not going to pull punches just because they’re showing me respect. I don’t want them to fail. Quite the opposite. I want them to get their shit together. They could really kick some ass if they made efforts to spruce this place up. The game selection isn’t that weak. Some of these titles are real smash hits and the ones that aren’t are at the very least eccentric enough to be interesting. 

There’s Some Love Here

If there is one feature on the whole site that I actually appreciate it’s that they actually list the exact file size of the download of the game right under the title. I’ve never seen another game curation site do this. Maybe I’m blanking on it, but I’m pretty sure this is some rare shit. For some of you this isn’t important, but trust me, there’s a lot of information here. It’s not about the download size itself, it’s about the game. A 1GB game with 3DCG art is going to last several hours. If it’s 50MB you know you can’t get a single fap in. It’s informative. You know how much content you’re getting, even if it is kind of hazy. 

This doesn’t apply to all games, of course. If a game is made in Unity for example, it’ll weigh several GB without nearly as much content as a 3DCG, but I still love the approach. Plus, some of you have shitty internet connections and even shittier computers with low storage. I can’t believe that this is the only part of the site worth praising, but there it is. File sizes. Yay.

I’ll Try to Be Positive

When I first started doing this job, years ago, I was really excited at the prospect of staring at titties all day every day. Little did I know I’d be reviewing places like AdultGamesCollector and trying to squeeze a drop of value out of a fucking stone. All right, give me a second. I’m going to put on my optimist glasses and try to review this entire website, again, right now. 

Welcome to AdultGamesCollector. This place has games for all platforms, provided you dig deep enough to find them. You can download them all for free, maybe, and navigating your way around the site will only be somewhat painful. If you feel any discomfort in your balls while browsing AdultGamesCollector, take a break, do some yoga and come back. Make sure to drink a lot of water.

Hang Out with the Community

The best part of AdultGamesCollector is easily the comments section under each game. The more popular a game is, the more comments you’ll find. A lot of the games on here have spurred quite the intelligent debates in the comments section. You’ve got people from all walks of life sharing their opinions here. If your idea of a hot fap is reading a bunch of men’s testimonials on their faps, you’re going to have a great time on AdultGamesCollector. 

The best way to enjoy AdultGamesCollector is to check out the very first game that catches your eye, try to download it and hope it goes through. At the very least I don’t have reason to suspect it’ll have any viruses. For some reason, porn games rarely have viruses these days. Maybe we’ve evolved as a species. I’ll come back to AdultGamesCollector in the future and hope to see something better. In the meantime, well, you have this review to keep you warm.