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Updated on 15 January 2020
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Sakura Swim Club

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Well, what do you know, it’s another Steam hentai game. Lately, these have been cropping up like unstoppable weeds across Steam’s entire fucking library. It used to be that the real hot OG porn games on Steam would take the cake, but then they all got shot in the head during the great porn wars of 2018. Ever since then, the platform evolved into a sort of breeding grounds for non-pornographic smut titles. Most of these are hentai visual novels.

Today, we’re looking at Sakura Swim Club, one of the several titles by developer Winged Cloud. It’s about as generic as porn visual novels get, but there’s a lot to be said about this game and the two pairs of tits within.

Average Joe

In this game, you play as a completely average high school dude-bro called Kaede. He moved to another high school for some fucking reason and immediately met the two hottest bitches on this side of Mount Fuji. I don’t understand why every single hentai game has you playing as an average Joe. I don’t mean that they didn’t bother to write a story for the character, I mean that they literally wrote “Your average high school guy” in the game’s goddamn description on Steam. I would have preferred no introduction over this, to be honest. It’s like you’re going out of your way to say, “Our game is generic. Please buy it”.

Whether you like him or not, this dude is the only playable character you get. He’s decently witty, and his cock is big enough to plow these bitches until they cream themselves, so who gives a shit. On top of that, he’s got some daddy issues that seem to be important at certain parts of the game. Yes, you heard that right, the male character has daddy issues. Apparently, his dad’s rich or some shit, and that makes him a big deal at the school. I wasn’t paying a lot of attention to his backstory, to be honest.

Wet Tits in Tight Swimsuits

If my high school swim team had nothing but two pairs of EE cup breasts in ultra-tight spandex, I’d probably have spent more time actually giving a shit about this activity. This is a fantasy hentai world though, so we’re working under the natural laws of hentai. That means that every girl that you interact with has to have massive tits that flop around uncontrollably all the goddamn time.

It might sound like I’m complaining, but honestly, this was my favorite part of the game, just staring at their tits. I honestly can’t pick a favorite, since they… kind of have the exact same pair of tits, but whatever. It’s not like I have to choose between the two of them. That would be a fucking nightmare.

So you’ve got a blonde bitch and a brunette bitch, and they’re both equally annoying. The blonde is stand-offish, and the brunette is clearly working through some issues. She’s the more submissive one. In general, however, they both desperately need your cock if they’re going to fix what ails them.

A Story

You might be thinking that that’s an underwhelming headline. Maybe I should have put more effort into it? Nah. This game’s story doesn’t deserve my effort. It deserves a one-handed click-through so I can get to the good stuff, because fuck me, it’s so generic. I genuinely thought that I had already played this game, because I remembered the exact same plot, but as it turns out, I was thinking of another game in which it was the engineering team, not the swim team that needed your cock.

So, apparently, these girls need you on the swim team, and by golly, are they going to have you. You spend the majority of your time doing swimming lessons and generally staring at their bodies instead of paying attention to the lessons. I very much appreciate my boy Kaede’s focus.

There are also some subplots that you bounce back and forth between. Apparently, the brunette bitch is depressed because she lost a friend in a swimming accident a year back, and the blonde bitch is just generally suffering from a bad case of being uptight. Both of these subplots unravel gradually as you click your way through the game, and eventually, they lead nowhere, because no-one actually cares about the plot of hentai games.

Neutered Hentai Experience

I mentioned that after the great Steam war on porn games, the platform became flooded with hentai visual novels. I know what you’re thinking: that makes no sense. You’re right; it doesn’t. You see, these hentai games were made by clever developers who found ways to cheat the system. In short, they castrate their own games, removing any piece of hentai that could be found within. Then, they leak a patch that restores the hentai back into the game, but pretend they had nothing to do with it.

And just like that, you’ve got yourself a proper H game on Steam, and they’re none-the-wiser. Or, maybe Steam knows that this is going on under their noses and they’re turning a blind eye; taking the cash and running. Who the fuck knows? One way or another, you get proper, uncensored smut scenes on Steam, so no complaints there.

The Winged Cloud Saga

You might find this developer to be a familiar name, especially on Steam. They’re one of many developers who’ve figured out a killer formula for making tons of money on Steam, and they’re milking it for all it’s worth. Basically, they’ll get an actual proper hentai artist to draw super-hot sex scenes that amount to maybe 10 minutes of solid fapping. Then, when it comes to the rest of the game’s development, like story and gameplay, they just mash their keyboards until something comes out.

Bada-bing, bada-boom, you’ve got yourself an H game. Nothing in this game makes any sense what-so-ever, except for the hentai. So, on the one hand, I warmly recommend it for really high-quality faps. On the other hand, I feel like it’s a waste of your time, but it ultimately remains your call. Keep in mind that the developer did not bother to give you any actual gameplay. Yeah, you can decide some dialogue choices, but they don’t actually change the game. Everything ends up exactly the fucking same, no matter what you do.

It would appear that this developer is churning out as many of these games as humanly possible, with minimal content, to cover their spread. That might also explain why you literally only bang two chicks in this entire game, and that’s it. Nothing else actually happens. Hell, you spend most of your time in at the pool just watching them swim.

The Smut Scenes

You guys should know by now that if I’m going to rag on a game’s downsides, I also have to give credit where credit is due. I’m a real stand-up guy. So, the sex scenes – they’re amazing. They’re really hot, like straight out of a modern hentai production and there’s not one thing about them that I didn’t enjoy. You fuck the girls harder and dirtier the more they open up to you, and they take the cock damn near every way they can.

First, you fuck them separately. You cum into their mouths, there’s some titty-fucking, of course, and finally, you get to fuck them both at the same time. You also get to see their entire bodies, head to toe, in great detail. Plus, you’ll recall there’s no censorship what-so-ever, if you downloaded the porn unlocking mod.

These are the kind of sex scenes that every weeb dreams of. Personally, I’m not big on anime, but I’ll polish my flagpole to this kind of smut any day. If a chick has giant tits and she’s got a craving for cum, I’m all set. That’s my territory.

My Verdict

This might well be your next favorite hentai game, at least on Steam. You’re sure to enjoy playing it, especially your first time around, but I doubt it’ll keep you entertained for long. The game is just really shallow for what it offers. You get a bunch of hentai, you jack off, and you want to move on to something else. There’s not a lot of content there.

You’re pretty much just digging into the boring, generic minds of two very annoying chicks whose only redeeming qualities are their tits and their holes. Granted, most women are like this, but still, this is a video game. We could at least pretend that women are fun to talk to in a video game. But no, you don’t get any of that. The game drones on for a while, then you have sex, rinse, and repeat. You decide whether that’s worth 10 of your hard-earned dollars.

BestPornGames Likes Sakura Swim Club
  • Ultra hot hentai tits
  • Short dialogue
BestPornGames Hates Sakura Swim Club
  • Boring, cookie-cutter story
  • Needs porn-mod