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Listen up, you fucks; it’s about time you play a game that tugs on your heartstrings as much as you tug on your 2-inch micro-dick. No, I’m not going soft. I think this game might teach you betas a thing or two about normal human interaction. You know, that thing you do where you actually go out and have a conversation with a woman. Yeah, I know it sounds like a foreign concept, but stick with me here. There’s more to hentai games than just big tittied cowgirls getting milked and pumped full of semen, though that shit is fantastic in its own way.
Wait, right, the game. Katawa Shoujo. It was developed by 4leaf studios, which originated from the degenerates over on the /a/ board on 4chan. You weebs have probably heard of this game. It was about as popular as Homestuck and whatever else it is you cucks liked back in 2012. It still has a very active community and following on forums, game sites, and all of that good stuff. And it deserves every bit of that love. This game has a ton of unique themes, concepts, and character ideas that had never really been explored in a visual novel before it.
Jam-Packed With Thousands of Lines of Well-Written Dialog
In short, Katawa Shoujo is a visual novel with flowery writing and a storyline that can go a ton of different directions. And it is all free. You can get the game over at katawa-shoujo.com, but you will need a torrent client to extract the file. Though I’d be surprised if you basement-dwelling weeaboos didn’t have a torrent client. It’s not like being a Reddit mod pays the bills.
You should all feel right at home with the main character. He’s some beta named Hisao Nakai, but at least he’s got a hot babe named Iwanako who wants to fuck him. Have I already lost you? I forget that you fucks probably haven’t ever had a girl fawn over you like this. Anyway, she left him a note and told him to meet up in the park. She asks Hisao out, and he has a goddamn heart attack right then and there. Talk about cockblocking yourself. Hisao wakes up in the hospital and is pretty damn mopey.
This dude can’t catch a break. People stop visiting him and just don’t seem to care at all about him. At least, that’s what he thinks. Even Iwanako ghosts this dude. Though who could blame the chick? She asks out this random guy from her class, and he nearly fucking dies. She’s probably going around thinking she’s got a superpower that can kill.
Romance Any of 5 Main Characters With Complex Backstories and Personalities
Eventually, Hisao gets out of the hospital. But he has to go to some lame-ass school for disabled kids called Yamaku Academy where there’s a 24/7 nursing staff on hand. Here is where the actual game starts to take place. Up to this point, it’s just been line after line of flowery dialog. Now, I’m not against a slow burn type of deal, but man does it take a while to get started. And, I get it, that’s what these visual novels are all about. “Novel” isn’t in the name for nothing. Still, I wouldn’t dive into this game expecting to bust a quick nut or anything like that. It’s more about the feels and the relationships you build with the girls in your new class.
Now, this isn’t a fully voice-acted game or anything like that. You won’t be listening to sluts moan to you about getting all of their holes filled. There are some minor sound effects, but the vast majority of the game is text-based. Thankfully, the writing is pretty solid. Goes to show the quality you can get when the story isn’t being done by some sex-starved weeb who is jerking off with the other hand and typing with the other. The writing style may not be for everyone, but the writing and narrative are all very well done.
The way it works from here is that there are five different routes that you can take to woo different babes. For you cucks, I’d recommend going after Lilly. After all, she’s blind and won’t have to deal with looking at your ugly asses, though her heightened sense of smell might make that a no go for some of you. And this shit takes awhile. You can expect it to take anywhere from 5-10 hours before you get a peek at what the sex scenes have to offer. And these aren’t high intensity fucks fests by any means. They are lovey-dovey makeout seshes and softcore images that are supposed to make your heart flutter.
Enjoy a Riveting Story with Many Different Endings
Getting those romantic endings is no easy feat. You’ll want to consult a guide or wiki if you don’t want to fuck it up because the bad endings blow. It’s not like Hisao will drop dead from a heart attack, though sometimes you might wish he would. This fucker is so dense sometimes. It’s like he’s deliberately trying to avoid getting pussy. Yeah, I know last time he nearly died when a babe talked to him, but playing him can be frustrating as all hell sometimes.
For a game produced by such a small team of people, there is a ton of art and animation. And all of it is crisp and nice to look at. All of the characters have unique designs, themes, animations, and more. If you really put the time into this sappy ass game, then you will probably have a great experience.
Even I’ll admit that the game got me kind of hooked on the story. Sure, I usually prefer to bust a nut and move on with my day. But, fuck, the game is so damn good that I couldn’t help but find out why the one babe in the class had a burnt face, how some other girl became deaf, or how the fuck the petite slut who wears panties everywhere lost her legs.
Tons of Softcore Erotic Content & Themes
I’d say there isn’t a whole lot of fetish content in this game, but the entire damn thing is about romancing and fucking disabled babes. I don’t know what the hell is kinkier than that. If you work at it, you can get steamy scenes of you making sweet, sweet love to amputees, blind chicks, and more. Hey, I’m not here to judge your crazy ass fetishes. It’s just a shame that you have to play hours upon hours before you get to see that Rin girl with no legs spread her stumps for you.
BestPornGame’s Favorite Features
The best part about Katawa Shoujo is the story. If you’re not going in for the romantic narrative and complex personalities of the characters, then you should fuck off and play some quick hentai game where some generic slut is getting fucked by tentacles. This game is about giving you a heart boner. Is that a saying? Fuck it; it is now. The writing is on point. The animation and illustrations are stunning. If you’re looking for a genuinely good game with a solid story and a little bit of softcore porn action, then give Katawa Shoujo a shot.
As much as I liked the story and all that, man can it be a little slow at times. There’s a scene where you have to talk to your buck-ass naked dormmate as he rants about the “feminist conspiracy” for like 60 lines of dialog. And he’s the first person you see naked! That’s some bullshit. At least string me along with a little flash of titty here or a nice booty there.
BestPornGame’s Final Thoughts
Overall, Katawa Shoujo is a great romantic visual novel with tons of little details that will keep you coming back to play through it again and again. After all, you’ve got to see where all the main five storylines take you, right? Again, if you’re looking to fap to this shit, then you’ll probably be shit out of luck unless you want to blue ball yourself for some softcore porn towards the end of the game. But if you’re in it for the story and characters, then you’ll probably have a great experience with Katawa Shoujo.
- Well-Written Dialog and an Engaging, Complex Narrative
- Five Different Characters to Romance
- Completely Free Game With Lots of Replayability
- Beautiful Illustrations and Animations
- Very Slow Going Game
- Not Great for a Quick Fap